bitten by the (travel) bug

One of my goals earlier this year was to travel more, and as the end of '09 is quickly approaching, I think I've gone "booyah" on my goal, and then some. It hasn't been easy though, I must say. Traveling (or leaving the house in general) is a particularly hard feat to accomplish if you are a single Indian girl in your late 20's living under the roof of the parentals. Whenever I inform my parents that I am going on a trip somewhere, I am met with a flood of reactions that include:

"vhaaaaat?"

"vhy are you alvays going somevhere?"

"vhy cant you stay at home?"

"it is not safe to go everyvhere all the time"

"vhy do you need to drive at night" (true statement)

and of course the perennial favorite: "this is vhy you are not married" (although everything I seem to do/not do fits into this particular statement) quickly followed by "going vit friends and

spending money vont get you married!"

Ahhh, yes. fun times!

Somehow I managed to worm my way out of things this year. Anyone who knows me well enough, knows that I might be into planning things. Just a little though- a couple of lists and excel spreadsheets detailing our intinerary here and there. Hey this comes in handy when you need to go on trips! This Spring I was able to go to London and Spain with three of my best friends and it was a long time coming. Just being exposed to a culture that is far different from yours is a learning experience. Leaving behind your community really does contribute to self-growth and awareness of yourself and others.

I learned: the detail and skill that goes into the construction of the smallest monument and how grand it can be centuries later; that the English can be rude but also tolerant; that the Thames River should not be messed with; that the confidence and style of a London city girl is tres chic; that the city of Barcelona is magical in so many ways; that sunsets in Ibiza are worth waiting hours for; and that drinking fresh Sangria outside on a dusky eve while talking about life with your best friends are memories that you will never forget. I also learned that planning isnt everything but it helps get you to where you need to go. Okay maybe thats a lesson I'm still learning ;-)

Recently I was able to go to on many visits to New York (still one of my favorite cities) and also discover new cities worth knowing. I fell in love with Chicago with its clean streets, beautiful architecture, cozy coffeeshops, dog parks and the best: happy friendly people. If not for the turdtastic freezing weather, I could totally see myself living there. New York has a grit and vibrancy that is and real and unmatched, but Chicago offered me a breath of (slightly cleanier) fresh air. Next week it is LA and I hope to enjoy California, no doubt about it. The end of the year is off to the homeland - and I shall be anxiously waiting to see what new treasures (and scary insects) India has to show me. Next year I have my sights set on certain beach towns in Mexico and I won't stop there! I'll be armed with my passport, my camera, and since maybe an excel spreadsheet for good measure.

But seriously, my travels this year have really shown me what a lucky girl I am. Many people are ions more well-traveled than I, and I can see how it can become addicting. You really do feel alive and connected with the greater world when you leave your bubble. I shared many moments and memories in various cities with people I really care about. I'm blessed enough to be able to go places at this point in my life. But as each trip ends, I know I can come back to the safety and comfort of my home and family and also be content with what I do have. And at the end of the day, no matter where you go....Dorothy had it right. Theres no place like home.

crazy ramblings

I have spent my days stringing and unstringing my instrument, while the song I came to sing remains unsung. ~Tagore

I feel like the last couple of months have been a giant ball of emotions for me. I've gone up and down with so many situations, things and people. It's been quite a ride for someone who is so used to being the rock of reason. I can usually tip the scales to get the balance of rightness I need in my life, but when things come at a barreling pace its hard to remain so strong on that tightrope. Definitely not as dramatic as it sounds, but still overwhelming to me.

It's always so disconcerting when people who you let into the inner chambers of your heart do something, say something...or do nothing to affect you aversely. I dont like letting vulnerabilities show and when they do, I let my humor take over.

I've learned that having high expectations for others is one of my biggest flaws. This has come up a lot lately. Some people can shrug off dissapointments and say que sera, sera. But when I invest time with you, I'm sharing a part of myself with you, and when that is shrugged away or taken for granted...it stings. Everytime I put myself out there in some capacity and get my trust broken, it is starting to leave deeper indentations. Hopefully its not leaving wrinkles too.

I think I'm at a weird time in my life where words, silence, action or inaction feel magnified. The little things are starting to get to me. Am I turning crazy? Perhaps. I dont like the feeling of fragility and of holding back who I am. But its natural I guess to protect myself. I am definitely a part of the issue. When things don't always go the way you want them to be, its easy to be bratty or paint yourself the victim. That's just something I dont buy.

The people I most admire in life are those who struggle and bounce back. I've always been drawn to resilience in others. People who don't let their circumstances or situations define them. People who you can count on when the chips fall, when things are at there worst, who just dont walk away from the situation because its too messy. People that dig roots and hold to them strong when there's a storm overhead. I think I've just described my parents, but I guess they are pretty much who I want to be when I grow up.

I hope my generation and the ones that follow will not lose old school morals. I hope they still hold a place today, because I know I'm trying to cling on to them. Helping your neighbor, being loyal and just thinking past yourself. It's scary when you can't trust someone you thought you knew. Pulling the wool out of your eyes and all that. I guess it's a part of growing up, but that also makes me sad. Someone told me I was 12 years old going on 45. I think there may be some truth in that even though I said "eww" when told this. Maybe I want to capture how in harmony things were when I was 12 years old. I know everything wasn't perfect back then, but it felt less scary. It's weird that I'm starting to become the narrator in the Wonder Years- the older brown girl version of Kevin Arnold. That is all.

warm fuzzies

I once did a "I heart _____ "survey that I really liked. Reminds me of good things and good memories. Here it is, with a few new additions making it extra long for you to enjoy :

I heart:

home-cooked food; totn; my dad's endearments; gingerale; friday's with the naviners; making music videos with my cousins; sunsets; my ammachi's enveloping hugs; haagan das; activists; clooooney; brooklyn heights summers; the cosby show; Love Actually; the washington redskins; sitting on the front porch with my appachen; cafes; Kerala; compassion; old people; idealism; keepin it real; lomo saltado; nerds; childhood friends; being a chechy; 521 adventures; The Navins; Team E; OA; instant connections; carlton dances; Trader Joe's; the hope of a new immigrant; hooded sweatshirts; my mom's strength; volunteering; photo albums; inside jokes; drawing; softball; Siracha sauce; all the excitement of watching a Skins game at Fed-Ex; my brother's imitations; american studies; handbags; home design; the color turquoise; naps without interruption; chubby, smiling babies; hard workers; cleveland park; changing into my home clothes; jasmine scented anything; being brave; new york city; people watching; bonding; compelling lyrics; down comforters; lifehouse, live; silliness in all forms; henry street; freedom fighters; chocolate chip cookies; chai done right; real fans; Onam; weddings; photography; emails; new books; old books; blankie; buildings with a story to tell; leaders who step up; everyday heroes; honesty; art museums; sunset roses; integrity; mint; being curled up inside on rainy days; planning trips; thai food; pavams; DC; letting something speak for itself; days off during the middle of the week; goofy sayings; akkara episodes; family; Qurbana; ginger; jewelry; originality; buying gifts; making a list and checking it twice; board games; clean sheets; bookstores; a warm cup of tea; kindness; my girls; traveling; realizing goals; totn; catching up; rocos; Sangria; loyalty; laughing out loud; reciprocation; long conversations; movie theaters; roadtrips with fun people; being right; reading blogs; skirt weather; nicknames; telling stories; being home after a long trip; RDTHSing; kenneth the page; spring; faith; chivalry; acceptance; smiling with your eyes, too; humility; the ability to woohoo; spreading the light; believing without seeing.

25 Random Things About Me

I took Suj's lead and posted these on my blog instead of FB, mostly because I have no new topics to share with you all. Any survey with the word "Random" in them- I just can't resist!

1. The greatest invention in car history was not the automobile itself, but the switch on my steering wheel that lets me change the radio stations with one button. When I am driving my mom's car, which doesn't have this magic switch, I still do the motions with my left thumb because I am convinced I can make it appear.

2. I have to listen to a morning talk radio of some sort, while getting ready for the day, because I do not like silence. But I do NOT like talking to people in the morning until I've reached work. Not a morning person at all!

3. When I see little old men, they make me want to hug them forever- Elmira style. I love all old people, but especially little hunched over old men. Irresistible!

4. I always hold the door open for someone behind me, no matter how rude they are.

5. I've become a tea drinker- thanks to people at my work.

6. I love making lists and crossing things out, including writing the words "make a list" on my list and writing things I've already done, just so I can cross them out.

7. I refuse to watch a popular television series or movie series until I've watched the very first one. I hate going out of order, so I never even start them. Therefore I haven't seen Star Wars, Harry Potter, Bond movies, SATC (ironically saw the movie), Lost, 24 and House to name a few. So the score is: Me: 0, Popular Culture: +156.

8. I hate the process of getting to the gym, but once I get there I'm amped!

9. I cannot stand conceit, flippancy and boasters. I love confidence, compassion and humility.

10. I am left-handed and only really use my left hand to write. Everything else I'm right-side dominant. I bat, use a tennis racket, kick, cut things with and brush my teeth all on my right side. I think I had to learn to adjust to this right-centric world!

11. I am the only one in my family (both my moms and dads sides) to have really curly hair. Joy.

12. I like all the excitement of getting ready with my girlfriends (talking, music, makeup) more than I like actually being out in a crowded establishment.

13. I have probably watched every romantic comedy out there and will continue to pay good money for very bad roco movies. I also watch teeny movies on abc family and like taylor swift. There, I said it.

14. I like having my Word documents justified and it bugs me when this is jacked up.

15. The older I get, the more I enjoy hanging out with my parents (when they are NOT lecturing me) and crack up at everything they say.

16. I absolutely LOVE getting new emails (and comments on my blog ;-)). I will usually respond to you quite quickly. Biggest pet peeve is when people don't give a timely response to an email you've sent when you KNOW they read it.

17. I have to drink two full glasses of water every night before I go to bed or I can't fall asleep. Then I wake up at 5am every morning and trip over something on the way to my bathroom. Without fail.

18. I like to infiltrate my weird sayings into all of my friends vocabs so that they use them without noticing, and then I secretly smile.

19. I think medicine could sometimes be my true calling yet I am a hypochondriac who has memorized WebMd and is intensely scared by hospitals, death, and injury and disease.

20. I have a phobia of scary public restrooms and what I will find in them, even to the point that I have nervous dreams of them.

21. I have a blanket that I cannot go to bed without. Yes, its my blankie, you meanieheads! I wuv it.

22. I love home design on a budget and can't wait to decorate my own space.

23. Sunsets are the most beautiful thing God has created on this earth, and they always make me think of Him. I think that's why sunset roses are my absolute favorite.

24. I love talking about the same stories and inside jokes with my friends- they never, ever, get old to me. If that's sad- I don't care!

25. George Clooney may be my dream man, but Coonannnn O'Brien takes the cake for making me cry with laughter. Funny nerds rule :-)

slithering phalanges!

Today I sat down to eat my lunch (salad and veggie dumplings) and I opened the lid of the salad container and the top third half of my salad exploded on my desk. Out flew cherry tomatoes, bits of shredded cheese, romaine lettuce, and garbanzo beans and they met in a beautiful mid-air symphony of salad cohesion, but alas, found their ulitimate fate as a giant glob of gaggers strewn all along my desk. Case of the mondays? no. Chance happening? no. Everyday occurence in the life of me? Buuut of course!

I think "butter fingers" should be my middle name (that, or Funners Mcgee because, really, how cool would that be?). I would make Bart Simpson proud as the namesake of his favorite candy bar. I am notorious (always have to sing "no no notooorious" after i heard that word, big ups to Biggie) in my family for dropping every tangible thing known to man that unfortunately (for object) finds its way to my hands.

So I may have knocked down a few water glasses in my time and let Corelle Dinner plates slide through my fingers and stared in horror as they either did one of two things: 1) had a clean methodical break into two distinct halves (this never happened in my world) or 2) break into a million little pieces with 75% of the pieces falling underneath the spice pantry and fridge. I quickly learned that the broom and dustpan were my best friend as a child. Imagine telling a malayalee mom that you broke one of her plates, bowls, or glasses. Lets just say its not a pretty picture.

When my mom gave me the task of stirring the yogurt/milk to make mora, I ended up with a yellow-tshirt, thanks to my stirring skills. When getting a bowl of uncooked rice to put in the pot on the stove, I will knock down the entire barrel of Uncle Bens. When moving groceries to and fro my car, my paper bag will tear mid-stride and I am left looking under the car for an errant apple. When moving my boxes to my car, I will slam the door on my cell phone attached to my hip, break the screen and then almost run over it with my car. When in our weekly meeting at work, I start playing with my pen and then watch as my boss stops talking, and we all stare at its flight across the room. When walking through the Crystal and China section in a department store, I literally have to make sure my hands are held tightly to my sides (military style) and walk robot-slow like a weirdo. Such is the life I lead, thanks to my fumbling phalanges.

Word to the wise: If ever you come into the possession of a precious Faberge egg or a delicate dinosaur limb of some sort, do NOT, i repeat do NOT, give it to me hold.

hope and change

"If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lose that courage to be, that quality that helps you to go on in spite of all. And so today I still have a dream. "
~Martin Luther King, Jr., The Trumpet of Conscience

How fitting we honor the leader of the civil rights movement on the eve of change. To all of the freedom fighters who got us to this moment!

To being the Change!

keep your love locked down

"What would you think if I sang out of tune

Would you stand up and walk out on me

Lend me your ears and

I'll sing you a song and I'll try not to sing out of key

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends"

-The Beatles

As I've grown older (just writing that line is evidence of me reaching this feat), I've learned to really appreciate the relationships I've shaped in my life with the people that are closest to me. I weave maternal strings (perhaps my euphemism for being controlling :-) ) through those I care about and I have always taken my role of listener, cheerer-upper, and mender quite seriously. If birds didn't freak me out so much, I would follow my natural inclination to help wounded ones that appear on the side of the road or in fairytales.

Most times I like to be friendly and can be self-described as a "people person," in the sense it is sometimes easy for me to make friendships and keep them. Yes, I'm one of those people that love meeting other friendlies (note: friendlies dont mean crazies) and bonding in general niceness. I try to steer clear of the meanieheads walking around with black clouds of negativity. I don't mind chatting next to the stranger in the seat next to me as long as they are not creepy. Once I befriend you, I tend to hang on. Of course it would help if there is some sort of reciprocation, otherwise it might turn into me being a stalker.

I tend to give people second chances when they don't follow through with things or break plans or never get back to me. If the roles were reversed, I know I would be SO hard on myself for disappointing someone, its actually one of those things that would eat at me for days. Im still old fashioned enough to believe that my word is my word. I realized that some of these people so easily break promises without a second thought and only when they are burned, do they get angry. Not very fair and just rudeness. A few of my relationships with people have been tested. People who I thought I understood and cared for deeply. At the end of the day I realized that where I valued them in the totem pole of my priorities is not necessarily where they valued me. Pretty blunt reality. I spent some time playing Celine Dion songs to myself and then realized through the help of my inner circle that they were not worth my concern.

I've reached that stage in my life where I am certain about which relationships really truly matter to me and make me a better person. It's a good feeling. This year I want to stop doing the chasing for once. I am truly blessed to have family and friends that understand the meaning of a two-way relationship and accept me wholeheartedly. Emphasis on the two-way :-) It's not always about your problems and your day.

Not many people can meet their "meant-to-be's" in life, and I've only just realized that I already have met mine. They make me laugh till I cry and slap me when I start going nuts, and likewise I will always return the favor. When I see them hurt, angry or betrayed, I feel it too. They are on my speed-dials and my crazy self is made sane by them. Sorry, you can't get rid of me! What a black-and-white world my life would be without them.

Thank you for being my constant sources of support and for listening to me when I freak out about something and then simply telling me I'm being crazy. Thank you for the good times and our ability to have fun anywhere, anytime, any place. Thank you for calling to talk to me, because you wanted to hear from me and....just cause. Thank you for sticking up for me when I was down on myself. Thank you for honesty, acceptance and encouragement.

This is my love letter to you.

skip sleep, do surveys

1. What is in the back seat of your car right now?
two natgeo magazines, a green umbrella, a large selection of winter scarves, a small army of elves, black cardigan, gym bag

2. What's your favorite curse word?
Turds Mcgee!

3. Name 3 people who made you smile today?
AsiaNet, my Dad, my bff

4. What were you doing at 8 am this morning?
Enjoying my time to sleep in

5. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
brushing my teeth and reliving my day to snow white

6. What will you be doing 3 hours from now?
hopefully in pleasant dream-land and involving George Clooney

7. Have you ever been to a strip club?
a resounding no thanks! gag

9. What is the last thing you said aloud?
Gaggers

10. What is the best ice cream flavor?
Chocolate Almond, Haagen Daas

11. What was the last thing you had to drink?
My fave beverage of choice and what covers most of this Earth

12. What was the last thing you ate?
Turkey Chili

14. Have you bought any new clothing items this week?
Nope and my credit cards thank me, even though the economy doesnt

15. What's the last sporting event you watched?
Watching the Cards spank the Panthers and being surrounded by Ravens fans

16. Who is the last person you emailed?
My bro

17. Ever go camping?
Not really into nature, bugs and potential critters that scare me

18. Do you have a tan?
A year-round one. Go melanin!

19. Do you drink your soda from a straw?
Not really into soda, but sure

20. What did your last IM say?
Inquiring about someone's day

21. Are you someone's best friend?
Yes and I am very blessed because of it.

22. What are you doing tomorrow?
See if I can make it to palli, watch a game or two, totn, Golden Globes

23. Where is your mom right now?
Sleeping like she deserves

24. Look to your left, what do you see?
Mrs. Potts, a bottle of water, and my jewlery box(es)

25. What color is your watch?
Silver. I appreciate time.

26. What do you think of when you think of Australia ?
My friend Sean recently went with his wife and I saw all their amazing pictures including the coral reefs and cute cuddly animals I might want to even touch.

27. Would you consider plastic surgery?
No

28. What is your birthstone?
Pearl. I need to get a nice set to represent.

29.How many kids do you want?
Two

30. Do you have a dog?
No but I would like to get one. Lately everytime I see a retriever, I want to steal it. Is that wrong?

31. Last person you talked to on the phone?
my bff and i needed that talk

32. Have you met anyone famous?
Lifehouse after a concert, Lisa Ling, Cesar Milan and he didn't whisper, also I may have stalked some famous boy-banders

33. Any plans today?
Well since its now tomorrow, i'd say I'll prob sleep first

34. How many states have you lived in?
Three

35. Ever go to college?
Yuppers

36. Where are you right now?
In bed, on my lappy

37. Biggest annoyance in your life right now?
I would say theres more than one, but I'm only acknowledging positivity

38. Last song listened to?
U2- One

39. Are you allergic to anything?
Dust and the Dallas Cowboys

40. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?
Navy Blue broken-in sneakers that I got in NY

41. Are you jealous of anyone?
Anyone in warm weather

42. What time is it?
1:20AM

43 Do any of your friends have children?
Only a few and I want to smush all their baby cheeks with love...so cute

44. What do you usually do during the day?
When Im not a circus clown or fending off the papparazzi, i might get some work done

45. Has something upset you lately?
Yes

46. Do you use the word 'hello' daily?
Usually a shortened form or one of my own greetings o fun

47. How old will you be turning on your next birthday?
Something too scary

48. Have you ever been to Six Flags?
Yes, to the Jersey one

54. How did you get one of your scars?
I probably fell somewhere since Im good at that

55. What is your best personality trait?
My genuine-ness/warmth and my ability to complete this survey

Goodnight all! And remember "luceat lux vestra"- let your light shine :-)

Ginger Love

I have become obssessed with all things ginger. Its quite sick, actually.

But alas, my love affair with ginger has not always been so amorous. As a child, I would pick out the mini-shreds of fresh ginger from my various kootans and whatnot. They tasted too strong, too pungent and generally McNasty to me. However, I found I couldn't get rid of them. Maybe thats because my mom LOVES putting ginger in everything. When I mean everything, I mean it ALL. From omelets to veggies to american dishes where they dont belong. She sings its medicinal and digestive praises and thinks it should be applied to every dish created in time. One day I could have sworn I saw some ingee buried in some sweet paysam at one party. So after decades of ginger-infusion, I've learned to love and appreciate the flavor as I've grown older.

Its clearly in my blood to love it. The english word Ginger is derived from "Ingee" the malayalam word. Maybe this introduction happened when nameless people came to our lands to steal all our spices and reap us of our natural resources (okay I'll stop before this entry turns into something much darker).

Origins, the botanical-based (and non-animal testing) awesome line of skin care products has had its Ginger infused-bath products line in stores for some time now. Its delightful and I think I've cleared out my local Origins store by making frequent visits for this special line. The people there are offically scared of me. Try the Ginger Burst body wash, the Ginger Scrub, and finish it off with the Ginger Souffle and your whole bathroom will smell super-yummy and your skin will look and feel fantastic. Also, you will turn into a giant Ginger root. (but dont worry, that's just a small side effect.)

My co-worker once dared me to try this "really gross" candy that this company from the UK sent them in a gift basket once. Apparently it was way too super spicy and strong, so my co-workers decided to have everyone who walked by taste it and then laugh at their victims grossed out faces. So when it was my turn, I was like "uhhh, sure I guess." Turns out it was hard ginger candy! My reaction was like "ohh i like this" wherein I got looks of "weirdo" sent my way.

Ginger snaps? yum! Gingerbread men? so delightfully cute! Injee curry? loves it! Ginger colored retrievers? My faves! Ginger from Gilligan's Island? Okay, fine i'll stop. There's no secret that the only carbonated beverage I really like is Gingerale. *GASP*

Now you'll have to excuse me, I have to gingeraly step away from my computer and go drink my warm delicious Yogi Ginger tea. Oh yes, and also fetch my royalty check from the Ginger Association of the Earth. :-)

hi nail, get in my tire!

I seem to be having a lot of lurvely car issues in the last month and a half. All of these issues seem to come at me during inclement weather as well- you know, just to add to my fun. My shift thingee froze on me and my car would not move. I've also have had THREE flat tires in the last six weeks. I seriously think that there is some little road demon hovering in front of me laying out bunches of nails (a la Hansel and Gretel, but much scarier) especially for me to drive over. And of course I fall for it everytime, and after a while of thinking to myself "something sounds funny", I pull over and get my lurvely tire treat.

This is the time I like to call home and tell my dad about my fun situation, and I get my just rewards by hearing a lecture about how I somehow caused my tire to get flat. On purpose. It's fun times, listening to my dad repeating the same thing, over and over (times five billion) on the phone.

I realize that I have no basic car knowledge skills whatsoever. I need to sign up for Shop101 or totn (things of that nature). They always seemed to offer that class at Bayside High, but never at my school. Jessie Spano got to take it, why can't I? I need to learn how to change a tire asap. It will help me from having AAA come save me.

One of my best friends just showed me how to put air in my tire and measure it, and of course I wasn't paying attention enough and have already forgot. This usually happens to me when something practical is happening. See I have this problem. All of a sudden whoever is explaining something useful to me, well their voice becomes like the mom on the Peanuts (wah wah wah wah) and I just stand there and nod like I understand. My worse nightmare is to be stuck on 495 with my car malfunctioning and having the entire metro area come get me! AHHH! Mr. Belding, sign me up!